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Written by Dr. Tony Madril

Consider how past trauma might be influencing family members’ behavior.

Consider the possibility that shame may be keeping family members from finding their own way out of trauma, and without addressing what happened, you might say that it’s as if they are walking through life on “automatic pilot” ––asleep––to the dysfunctional patterns there are repeating within their relationships.

Practice self-compassion.

Acknowledge that you were born into a family with a history of unresolved problems that have presented you with certain challenges. Try to take extra good care of yourself accepting that you may have added stress in your life that other people may not experience.

Allow yourself to feel angry.

Find a physical way to release your anger about the trauma that you have experienced and its connection to the family. Perhaps you might find a secluded place to yell and scream. Perhaps you can express your anger in the safety of a therapist’s office or within a support group of people who can relate to your experience.

Set healthy boundaries with family members.

Write down the boundaries that you need to feel comfortable around family members as well as practical ways that you might thoughtfully implement them on a day-to-day basis. Ask yourself if you need to pause communication or distance yourself from family members who might be causing you undue stress and are not willing to change their behavior.

Develop and maintain a self-care program that includes mindfulness.

If you haven’t done so already, create a self-care plan of things you can do on a regular basis to take good care of yourself like eating healthy meals and getting regular exercise. Consider meditating everyday as meditation has been shown to help reduce stress and regulate emotion.

Transform the negative energy into a higher purpose.

Find an activity that you are passionate about; use it to transform the negative energy generated by transgenerational trauma to serve a positive purpose greater than yourself. For example, you might mentor to a youth who is struggling with family dysfunction and might benefit from the emotional support of someone who understands their situation. Alternatively, many creative people transform intense emotions and negative experiences from their past by writing poetry, books, or movie scripts; others “write through” their trauma in song lyrics and then musically perform it for others.

Recognize ways that you might be re-enacting past trauma by continuing to play roles in life that no longer serve you.

For instance, some people may have been the over-responsible one in their family of origin; taking the blame for other family member’s hurtful actions to keep the peace. If you notice ways that you might be putting other people’s wants and needs before your own, you might want to consider your motivation for doing so and ask yourself if these ways of relating to others may be linked to “survival behaviors” you learned as a child.

If you would like to learn more about best practices for working through past trauma, I invite you to subscribe to my YouTube channel. Thank you!

This is Dr. Tony Madril with a few moments for your mental health. In this video, I am going to answer the following question: Could there be a link between past trauma and a person’s current health problems?

Hello…this is Dr. Tony Madril with a few moments for your mental health. In this video, I am going to answer the following questions: How does the brain store traumatic memories? Click the link to watch the short educational video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UA9Iwbi7Esk

Hello…this is Dr. Tony Madril with another three minutes for your mental health. In this video, I am going to answer the following questions:

1. How would I know if I have experienced childhood attachment trauma?
2. Are there any credible treatments for attachment trauma in adults?

Hello…this is Dr. Tony Madril with another three minutes for your mental health. In this video, I am going to answer the following questions:

1. What is childhood attachment trauma?
2. What are the potential consequences for adults with histories of attachment trauma?

Click here to watch the video

In this video, Dr. Tony Madril is going to answer the question: “What are some practical things I can do today to help me recover from the effects of transgenerational trauma?” Click here to listen.

In this video, Dr. Tony Madril is going to answer the question: “How might trauma therapy help me recover from the effects of transgenerational trauma?” Click here to listen

In this first of two videos on the topic of inherited vulnerability to mental health problems, Dr. Tony Madril is going to answer the question: “What is transgenerational trauma and how is it possible to recover from this type of family-related stress?” A vulnerability to health and mental health problems may be linked to the transmission of trauma through genes, through epigenetic changes to cells as well as through the social environment. Click here to view: https://youtu.be/IEKeaoh59G8?si=_FXnHFYwd5m2gpMz

In this video, Dr. Tony Madril is going to answer the question: How can asserting myself help me heal from past trauma? Making a conscious decision to assert yourself in a stressful situation may help you to lessen the long-term effects of past trauma…https://youtu.be/0GLUw-aYswk?si=MBtdbVXsEWSPZvaL